Memorial Day

Memorial Day... a day set apart from all other days. A day, as a nation, we remember those who willingly put themselves in harms way to support and defend our constitution, our ideals, and a way of life which we hold dear.

The reality is every day some family member in the United States thinks about a loved one who lost their life, who became a casualty of war, whether on or off the battlefield. Everyday, a father, a mother, a brother, a sister, an aunt, an uncle, a cousin, or a friend is missed... is longed for... is painfully grieved.

Lives have been lost due to wounds sustaind on the training ground, during battles, and after wartime from post traumatic stress. Other lives have been altered; changed in a blink of an eye, forever. As an individual, as a family member, as a friend, as a citizen we are all diminished by those lost to the ravages of war. On a soulful level, individually and collectively, we bear the wounds of the fallen and the brokenhearted.

We remember when our breath was taken away by the loss of a loved one, yet, we also know that when our tears dry, when a new day dawns, we will still remember. We will still grieve. We will still be proud of the courage, the bravery, and the love in which a solider chose to stand. We will remember. And we will honor the place each of these people have had in our lives.

As we stand in solidarity with the community of our fallen soldiers, our fallen brothers and sisters, we take note of the saying,

"E Pluribus Unum." - "Out of Many, One."

On this Memorial Day, we as a nation acknowledge, honor, and remember the individuals who have fallen... and we remember those who are Missing In Action, and in doing so, we unite ourselves as one to say,

"As a people, we will remember the life you gave. As a people, we acknowledge that your life mattered. As a people, we are changed by your courage as well as your loss. As a people, we say thank you for your dedication, intentionality, service, and sacrifice. And as a people, we long and pray for peace."

On this Memorial Day we remember... with love in our hearts and tears in our eyes... the soliders... the people... our loved ones.

No Slugs, Please

Nature called in the middle of the night last night. As I travelled from my bedroom to the bathroom, I was in that half sleepwalking fog, half scurrying mode where you don't really open your eyes, you just intuitively know how to blindly get from one place to the other... quickly.

Imagine my surprise after I rounded the living room and entered the kitchen... and stepped in... dog doo. My words were close to, but not exactly, "Ew, Ew Ewwwww... darn it!" Then imagine the rush of adrenaline as the fog lifted and I remembered that I don't have a dog!

I hopped the rest of the way into the bathroom, as a sound, that I have never heard before, was coming from my mouth. Fear had now replaced all my previous grogginess. So much so, that I was afraid to turn on the light. I didn't want to see what was mushed between my toes and I sure didn't want to see what had slithered into my house in the middle of the night! Oh God, please don't let there be slugs or snakes on this ranch.

Ewwwww! I felt like crying. I felt like throwing up. I felt like calling my sisters, my mom, and all my friends to come help me. I felt afraid to leave the bathroom. I felt afraid to even move. I felt paralyzed. I felt completely undone. I felt... like... I could... smell... banana.

I must have missed the trash can earlier in the evening when I threw away the bruised part. Relief doesn't begin to express my feelings that calamity had been diverted. Holy cow what a night. Dear God, I promise to never miss the trash can after eating a banana, if you promise that there will never ever be dog doo or slimy, slithery things on this ranch or in my house. Do we have a deal? Thank you. Amen

Remembering My Mom's Love

I remember when I was four… we lived in England. My two older sisters were in early elementary school. My mom would make a bag lunch for them every day, and then we would walk my sisters to school, which was in Miss Lacho’s home. Since the school was just down the street from our flat, I rode my tricycle to help escort the girls there in the mornings and then back home again later in the day.

Life was good… except for one thing. I wanted to be just like my two older sisters. They got to do everything I didn't. I can’t say I necessarily wanted to go to school at that point in time, but I did want a bag lunch. I remember as my mom would be making the bologna sandwiches in our dinky kitchen, I would be right at her side whining, “Pleeeeease….. Can I have a sandwich, too? Pleeeeease…”

How she stood it, I’ll never know… until that glorious day that she made me a mustard sandwich! Oh my God! She was the best mom in the world! I was on cloud nine. When we delivered my sisters to Miss Lacho’s, I rode sitting taller on that tricycle than I ever had before. I weaved in and around my sisters like nobody’s business! I owned that sidewalk! My mom made me a mustard sandwich and I knew in the deepest place of my soul that I was loved!

Truth be told, there have been quite a few mornings as I’m making my lunch to take to work that I also make myself a mustard sandwich for a pre-breakfast snack. As I stand in my dinky kitchen and eat, my mind either drifts off in wonder of how my mom is doing in Alabama or I remember that day fifty and a few years ago as I stood at my mom’s side, holding onto her leg, craning my neck as I looked up at her and begged for a sandwich, begged to be just like my big sisters. And I remember the twinkle in my mom’s eye as she lovingly looked down at me and handed me that sandwich and then ruffled my hair as she said in her quaint southern accent, “Now get out from under my feet.”

I love you, Momma Pat. Thanks for all the good memories and thanks for the mustard sandwich! Happy Mother’s Day! You’re still the best!

Did He Really Just Say That?

"On Monday, Missouri Rep. Rick Brattin (R-Harrisonville) was arguing against an amendment to Senate Bill 43, which would have banned discrimination in employment, housing and public accommodations based on sexual orientation and gender identity in the state, The Kansas City Star reports. At present,  residents can be fired from their jobs or evicted from their apartments for being gay, or just being perceived as gay. But Brattin said he believed extending anti-discrimination protections to LGBTQ Missourians would infringe on religious liberty.

“When you look at the tenets of religion, of the Bible, of the Quran, of other religions,” Brattin said from the Missouri House floor, “there is a distinction between homosexuality and just being a human being.”"

Excerpt of an article written by Curtis Wong. 5/11/17

My thoughts:

And the public dehumanizing by a government official continues. Rick Brattin's views have certainly been heard before, just not as loudly. And of course, those same views are shared by many of his Republican cronies. Why else would these type of arguments against gays and lesbians be touted over the last few years within state legislatures across the country?

What makes Monday's occurrence different is this time, we have an acting President who would eagerly jump on these ugly views and support them for the sole purpose of garnering "loyalty" for himself, for any future endeavor he desires. (If you are not in the 1%, I'm pretty sure his endeavers will not include you.)

If no one speaks out against these types of comments, how much easier will it be to pass laws that will blatantly discrimate against, gays, lesbians, Muslim, blacks, and the poor... and any other marginalized citizen.

To dehumanize a people group is the first step of the powers that be to suggest that America would be alleviated of its problems if she were to rid herself of these "non-humans."

In my life, I've heard many a Christian say if they lived in Europe during WW 2, they would have stood and fought for those who were dehumanized... i.e. the Jews, the Chistians, the gypsys, the gays, the lesbians, the disabled, and all the others who were declared non-human, and yet, those same people are supporting an administration and political party who are using the same type of verbiage to subjugate and suppress whole people groups.

Scoff at these words, I don't care... actually, I do care.

If you say you would have stood up for those dehumanized 75 to 85 years ago, then stand up for those of us being dehumanized today.

Now's your chance. If you won't be a voice or refuge today, don't kid yourself, you wouldn't have been one during the atrocities of WW 2.

Hate produces blatant hate. Indifference, in my opinion, is worse than hate.

If you would defend your political preference over a gay or lesbian, you are as much a part of the problem as Rick Brattin, and consequently, I am sad for the littleness of your soul.

If you say, "This is America. That could never happen," you have just minimized hatred, and burying your head in the sand will not lessen or stop the momentum of hatred.

Minimization is only one step away from indifference. Speak up now.  Call your representatives and voice your disapproval of the dehumanizing of any citizen... no matter whether you agree with who they love or not.

Don't be fooled. We as Americans are only as strong as our most vulnerable people. If we will not stand up for the vulnerable, when the tables turn and we become the vulnerable, they'll be no one to stand up for us.

I'm not asking you to change your political or religious philosophies, I'm asking you to find the courage to stand up for a group of people. Or if it helps to personalize it, stand up for me. I am a person; I am human. And I'd appreciate your help in stopping the hatred.

Unexpected Thank You

Every so often, I come across a book that captures my attention, and opens my eyes to a new reality. For days after I turn the last page, I find, in my more contemplative moments, that I am still processing the story and how it has changed my understanding of life. I return to these types of books yearly, or at least every other year. And each time I spend time in the pages, a new and fascinating discovery is found. I'll never tire of reading my favorites over and over again.

Most of my favorite books would be considered classics and sadly, the authors have passed on into another life. Yet, some of the authors are still alive, and every once in a while, I have penned or emailed a thank you note to thank them for the brilliant way they crafted their words to create a fictional dimension that has the capability to change lives in the here and now.

I never expect a response. Why would I? A thank you card from a fan, does not require a response. It is just my way to show appreciation for the hard and diligent work an author puts forth. It also, I hope, is an encouragement to them that their art has made a difference.

So imagine my surprise today when I opened my mail and found a beautifully crafted response of a thank you, for your thank you!

I haven't stopped smiling since I opened that letter! 😄

Soul Life

Every so often I learn something that reverberates within my being until it finds a place to settle, and then, change quickly follows.

This experience is not like placing an ice cube in a glass and watching the liquid rise to the point of overflow. No, what I'm speaking about is different. What I'm speaking about is like releasing an ice cube into the liquid and watching the glass expand.

I believe our souls are genderless. Yet, for the sake of writing artistically, and since I am female, I'm going to genderize the pronoun and use... she. I do this for no other reason than it sounds more respectful to me than the word it.

My soul is not static... she can grow, thirst, and rest. She can feel pain and sadness as well as strength and joy.

My soul is not my mind or my intellect, nor is she my heart or my personality. She is not my ego or the mask I wear.

Perhaps my soul, at my core, is an invisible container which somehow networks with all the other parts of my being to bring about a synergy within that completes me.

I'm not an expert in psychology; I'm not even an amateur. I am only speaking from my experience and my observations in life.

I'm always open to learning about the ways we survive and function, but mostly I want to know how to truly live.

And what I do know is as I live intentionally, as I lower the masks that I once found a sense of safety behind, as I know and am known, as I am diligent in seeking knowledge as well as wisdom, as I practice gratitude and humility, as I rest, and as I love... I will find growth in each of these areas.

In the midst of all that, I find at my core, in my heart of hearts, in the place where I give of myself to another and the place I receive from another into myself, I find me, my soul, the networking of all the facets of who I am... and I find she is aware and actively participating in the flow of life in and around me.

As I listen to and love her, as I "just be present" with no internal or external agenda, I find life. I find this life can grow or shrink, depending on how I nurture her with care, love, and truth.

In that place of being, I find the essence of who I am. And in that place all is well and all will be well.

On judging others...

"This is a difficult topic, Maxwell, and I have some questions, as well as, some thoughts. Okay?        
Say you have two people who are in love with one another and want to get married. They want to make a commitment to love, honor, and cherish one another. They want to share in a covenant of love and faithfulness with one another. And they dearly want God and their community to be their witnesses in this celebration. Both of these people are Christians, and to the best of their abilities, they each love God with all their heart, soul, body, and strength. And the fruit of this love for God is shown in their love for their neighbors as they do what they can to feed and clothe the poor, help the orphans and the widows, stand up for the downtrodden, and be a voice of love and reason against any injustice. These acts of kindness are for the neighbors they know and for the neighbors they don’t know. All in all, it would seem, any church in America would welcome these people, who willingly love God and walk out their faith by loving others, to be joined in matrimony…

as long as they were heterosexual.

So here are my questions, Maxwell. Why does it matter to the “church” if these two people are heterosexual or homosexual?

In light of the above description of this couple, why does it matter if they are a man and a woman, two men, or two women?

And if perchance, one or both of the homosexual people in this relationship wants to be ordained, how is that a bad thing?

I mean, they love God, they love their neighbor, and they desire to be in a committed and covenant relationship with one another. Are not all of those things desirous in a pastor or, for that matter, in a human being?

I hear your heart, Maxwell, and Father Gene’s, too, in saying, “there is only us, and we are all a mess."

I, too, stand with you in regards to this. God knows that other than Jesus, there are no perfect people.

However, I find in my church community of choice, I also stand on the outside of the church looking in.

I stand on the outside of a marriage covenant.

I stand, holding in the balance, either betraying the traditions of the church or betraying myself.

I find that in the diversities of these weights and balances, what really matters to me are three things:

loving God and being loved by God,
loving my neighbor -  no matter what,
and loving another soul and being loved by them.

In the scope of eternity, I ask you, what else matters?"


The above quote is a comment I posted on a Facebook thread many years prior to marriage equality. The topic is still relevant today in regard to gays and lesbians being accepted within ministry in most denominations.

It seems to me, until the heterosexuals within power in any church can put a stop to any and all sexual atrocities perpetrated by heterosexuals, within or outside of a ministry, they have zero rights to point a finger at homosexuals and label them deviant in comparison to heterosexuals.

No doubt, there is sin committed by homosexuals... just as there are sins committed by heterosexuals.

Falling in love with another heterosexual or homosexual adult is not a sin. However, in either case, if either of these persons use their power, whether it be physical, emotional, or spiritual to harm another, than that is the sin in which we should show our concern.

Within the context of adult relationships, it is not about who we love; it is about how we treat the one we profess to love.

Any person, no matter their sexual orientation, can bring either a blessing or harm to others... whether they are in relationship with the other or not.

When leaders within the church use their authority to label who, in their opinion, is deviant or outside of God's original intent or they take it a step further to say who is outside of God's love and grace, they have made the outcast and they have wounded the outcast.

In their words and in their actions, they show that they are, in fact, the ones who have perverted the name of a loving God. For the outcast will always be dear to God's heart.

Here's an honest question... do these leaders not think they have any sin in their lives?

For in the scope of God's holiness in which they are trying to protect, one single sin committed by a human, makes him or her a deviant.

We are all sinners.

I'll confess to you that I am a sinner. However, one of my sins is not the fact that I love another woman.

Before judging, remember...

When we find stones in our hands or judgemental words crossing our lips, they are a sure representation of sin as well as pride in our hearts.

Words can wound as surely as stones.

We should all remember, we will be judged in the same way we have judged.