My Heart is Heavy

My heart is heavy

My heart is heavy for I am alone

I am alone; I am unwelcome in the church

My heart is full of heaviness, my life feels the emptiness of separation

I am bereft

They say it's my fault

They say I am lost

They say I am evil for loving a woman

Their words do not call me home

They merely are spoken to divide us further

They say, "If you insist on being you than go die and be tormented for eternity."

As I drift away in loneliness, a heavy midst shrouds my heart

The words spoken echo in my ear

From a distance I hear, "We love you. That love compels us to condemn you."

I tilt my head at their words

Then wonder why I am sad for being excluded

And I realize... I love those who have condemned me and I grieve over the loss

And although I ache as I drift in the torrent we call life, I know that I will sleep well knowing I chose love instead of hate